What would I have to hear to change my opinion?

Next time, when you get stuck in your head, repeating the same problem over and over again. In a moment of awareness or through some reminder like a post-it note on a screen, ask yourself “What would I have to hear to change my opinion?”.

And then watch the mess.

Your ego will start to defend itself.

“Of course I am right, there is nothing that would convince me to think something else.”

“Pfff…”

“Well, maybe if X would be true… but it’s not so… anyway…”

“Is it really not true? How do I know it’s not true?”

“Oh, because it came from that guy I don’t like.”

“Why don’t I like that person? How did I get there?”

“Well, this is weird, is this whole self-inflicted? Did I just come up with that out of nowhere just in my head?”

“Nah, there must have been a reason! Yeah, I’m not an idiot!”

“Hmmm…”

“Ok, so let’s say that X is true… Not that it is! Just for the sake of argument…”

“X could be true…”

“Gooood dammit, I am a moron.”

“Fuuuu….”

“Anyway… luckily I haven’t told it to anyone. That would be embarrassing.”

This might take anything from a few minutes to a few days and several cycles of there and back. And in that time it will not be pleasant, but it will help you get a new perspective and learn something about yourself and others. Everyone else is going through this as well! Yes, you are not the only one with consciousness.

I found it to be a similar pattern to meditation. You will just keep failing at this, but it is worth trying, just so next time it is a bit easier and you might catch yourself earlier.

You might realise that you have tied yourself into a knot in more cases than one.

Good luck!